My friend Leslie over at My Country Home had an interesting post today...I decided to do my own version of it.......what do you want out of life? I have done both sides of the fence so to speak...I worked fulltime while having 3 children. I had no choice. I had all of my children in my 30's...so I was a bit older than some...anyway in January 1999, the company I worked for for 20 years had a buyout. I was the 3rd person to sign up! I knew it would give me the chance to stay at home with my children and at the same time give my husband a chance to re-start his career. In 1996, he lost his job of close to 20 years in a lay-off. After a couple of years of doing commission only jobs, we decided to take the next big step...he would stay home with the children while I worked during the day...he did a job in the evenings...this worked, but it wasn't what we really wanted...so...when the buyout was offered...this was perfect. I love staying at home with the children. It has given me chances to let them have play-dates, no babysitter, be there when they arrive home on the bus, etc. Has it been easy these past years? No! Has money been tight? Yes! We have struggled many times......but I do think we have provided a great home for the kids.
I don't need big trips, fancy cars, lavish house, etc. I watch my husband's family try to one up each other and I wonder if they are really happy, or is this a game they play. I will never have the material things they have.....nor do I need them.
I have been doing alot of reading lately and trying to come to terms with what I want to do with the rest of my life. I do believe that once my youngest is a bit older, I will look for a part-time job...yes, I will be in my early 50's by this time, but I think it's something I need to do. We'll see. I believe that what is meant to be...will be.
At any rate....some deep thoughts for a Monday morning.
Have a good day everyone!
Marion
Monday, September 29, 2008
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3 comments:
Marion,
Great post :) I think a lot about this stuff since Aften has went to school. I really became a SAHM, not by choice but by necessity. Shane was premature so he spent a month in the hospital. I didn't want to leave my baby who was only home for 2 weeks to go to work. Plus the cost for daycare is high enough, let alone for a preemie! Jer had just started a new job after being laid off permanently from his last and there was just no way to continue at my job...I couldn't work around his schedule with only one car (Besides, Shane was only about 8 weeks old when our office closed because my SIL ran off with the boss! LOL). I had no choice but I grew to love my job and we've learned to live within our means. No, we don't have newer cars or a bigger house like we would like to have some day but we have a LOT more than we started with and we are thankful for that. I just can't compare us to others....
People think we should be unhappy. They are saying how we should want more of everything and act like there is something wrong with us for not wanting it like next week. We have plans for the future, but we're realistic and know that it's not going to be next week, but maybe 5-10 years. I look at a lot of people around us and they have all the "stuff" but aren't happy....I'm happy, leave me alone! LOL
On Friday, I got my haircut. Well, the woman noticed I was alone and I told her that Aften went to school this fall. So I immediately get, "You need a job!" She thought I was bored and lonely. Well, some days it is too quiet for me and I have my bored moments because I can't decide what to work on next! I need a job....isn't that my decision? What is it with people? One day I will have a job, so we can have our things that we want and live comfortably. Honestly, we could get a mortgage loan and have the house and two new cars but we'd be strapped and miserable and I would rather not do that right now....
Have a great day!
Leslie
That is a deep thought for a Monday! I have exactly what I want out of life: a deep faith in God, a wonderful marriage, 4 healthy and happy children (though grown - I would have like to have kept them young!), a little cottage home, good friends, plenty to eat, clothes to wear and so on. I don't need the fancy stuff either. I think it just complicates life. I like life simple.
Gina
PS I forgot to add little Miss Matilda Bear.
Beautifully said, Marion. Success and happiness are relative terms, aren't they? We've made the choice for me to be home. It's not easy, but we're happy ... and patient. Everything in its own time. Living on a little less money is a sacrifice, but missing out on the kids' lives seemed the bigger sacrifice to us.
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